Upper Middle’s “Dream Second Home” survey examined what Oat Milk Elites want from a second residence and how their geographic preferences reflect their life circumstances. The survey focused on fantasies unconstrained by realities and, secondarily, on constraints. The findings suggest that there are, in fact, two different but overlapping second home markets – and that the desire for Nantucket vibes is correlated strongly (though not necessarily positively) to professional circumstance
The findings also suggest that very few of us really want a “getaway.” What we want is to get to the people and places that allows us to occupy a specific headspace3.
A Tale of Two Houses
Where respondents dream of owning a second home correlates with where they live and what they do — though certain aspirations seem to transcend geography. Among survey respondents, the most desirable domestic second home location was the Northeast Coast (35%), followed by Europe (29%), the Southeast Coast (19%), and Hawaii (18%). The fact that the Northeast and Europe top the list suggests that neither climate nor convenience outruns aspiration.
Within those broad preferences, wealth and profession predict destination more precisely than income bracket alone. The wealthiest respondents ($2.5M+ net worth) concentrate in Northeast Coast (40%) and largely abandon Florida (15%), while those with less savings ($100-249k net worth) lean more heavily (24%) toward the Sunshine State. These divergences are most evident around premium mountain destinations — Jackson Hole draws 8% of the $2.5M+ cohort and zero from middle-wealth respondents. Profession does its own sorting: tech workers lead on abroad interest (72%), creative professionals skew hardest toward Mountain (31%), and business and finance respondents are the most enthusiastic about warmer, southern beaches (33%). Second home preference doesn't just reflect wealth. It reflects paths to wealth.
The obstacles to second home ownership are predictable: cost (62%), maintenance (52%), and concerns the home won't get enough use (36%) dominate. This suggests that second homes are not purchased solely as luxuries but as sites of productive leisure. ROI is calculated in terms of time spent in the headspace they represent.
A Tale of Two Countries
Nearly two-thirds of respondents (65%) want a second home abroad, with the overwhelming preference (64%) being Europe — specifically Italy (26% of Europhiles), France (21%)4, the United Kingdom (10%), and Spain (10%). Counter to expectation, less wealthy respondents were considerably more likely than wealthy respondents to want a place in Europe: respondents worth under $50k want Europe at 84%, while those worth over $2.5M want it at only 56% — the lowest of any bracket. The top non-European destinations were Central America and the Caribbean (21% of abroad-wanting respondents), Mexico (9%), and Asia (9%).
The desire to live abroad was mediated by work engagement — or disengagement. Respondents who self-reported being checked out at work were more likely to want a home abroad (71%) than both fully-in-it workers (64%) and retirees (58%).
Preferences for Italy over France — or vice versa — were specifically correlated to attitudes about work. Simply put: Italy is for the toasted. Respondents interested in buying in Italy were not only more likely to describe their work status as “Checked Out” (8.6%), but also more likely to describe their travel style as "I want to not think about anything" (29%). France, on the other hand, attracted those who described their work status as “Coasting” (36%) and their travel style as seeking immersion (30%) or culture (26%). Provence was also more attractive to higher earners, with 15.6% of potential second home owners making $500k+ versus Italy's 7%.
France is a cigarette with dinner. Italy is a bottle of wine with lunch.
A Tale of Two Beaches
The most popular domestic second home destinations — Northeast Coast (35%), Southeast Coast (19%), Hawaii (18%) — are all on the water. When asked what attracts them most to their dream second home destination, respondents cited Access to Nature first (52%). Solitude (16%) ranked seventh, suggesting 42% of respondents want nature without solitude. We want to be outside. We don’t want to free solo.
What types of nature individuals prefer tracks with class origin. Working-class origin respondents choose Beach homes at 37% and Cape Cod homes at 20% — the lowest Cape Cod rate of any group. Wealthy-origin respondents invert that: Beach homes at 29%, Cape Cod homes at 35%. The wealthiest respondents by net worth ($2.5M+) concentrate in Northeast Coast (40%) and largely abandon Beach (19%). The pleasure coast and position coast are two different destinations.
Cape Cod choosers make the social logic explicit: They cite Social Scene as an attraction at 33% — the highest of any home type — while citing solitude at only 18%. Asked what would attract them to a second-home location, respondents led with Access to Nature (52%), Good Weather (40%), and Adventure/Activities (35%). Though nature ranked at the top of the list — and every place-ranking indicated proximity to the ocean was hugely desirable — social scene seems to mediate the type of nature people seek out more than vice versa. The nature they want comes with the right people in it.
Also, a bunch of respondents (3.4%) really care about golf.
A Tale of Two Days Off
The clearest finding in this survey has nothing to do with geography. It has to do with mentality. Second home preferences live downstream of two very different ideas about leisure. One cohort wants to soak up some sun. The other wants to soak up something more substantial. These two cohorts — the Tireds and the Wireds — are almost identical financially (47% of Wireds earn $200k+ compared to 46% of Tireds) and have markedly similar desire to be in nature (Wireds 52%, Tireds 51%). They differ predominantly in their relationship to arts and culture. For the Tireds, leisure means hanging out. For the Wireds, leisure means having plans — even if the plan is just to read a book.
The most plausible conclusion is not that these are two entirely different psychographics, but rather that people with similar lived experiences — and more specifically, similar experiences of work — cycle through different second-home preferences as their needs change. Sometimes they need recovery. Sometimes they need engagement. One telling trend within the data: Tireds skew younger than Wireds, which lends credence to the idea that needs shift over time.
Respondents climbing the ladder needed rest. Respondents who had climbed it wanted a view.
